Most people who divorce will remarry – many will do so within five years. Remarriage can be wonderful, but can also present opportunities to make the same mistakes or run into the same problems that contributed to the end of your previous marriage. Here are some steps you might consider to avoid the same problem.
Mistake: Marrying without a prenup
If you are divorced, you know how disruptive the process can be financially, legally, and even professionally. You might have lost a stake in a business or property you believed was separate; you might have also been through a long, bitter battle to resolve these matters.
Preventing this mistake can be as straightforward as having an attorney draft a prenuptial agreement and signing it with your partner. Prenups allow you to identify and protect property and establish rules for resolving disputes in the event of a divorce.
Mistake: Letting a previous marriage haunt you
Carrying old resentments, trust issues, and suspicions into a new relationship can create problems that may not have existed otherwise. After all, your new partner is not the same as your ex. But if you expect the same mistakes or failures, you could set yourself and your relationship up for complications and failure.
Thus, people hoping to avoid repeating this mistake often seek support and guidance from experienced therapists or couples counselors.
Mistake: Idealizing a blended family
Whether you or your new partner have children from a previous marriage, blending families does not always turn out like “The Brady Bunch.” There can be a lot of animosity between stepchildren, and transitions do take time.
To protect your children and family, take the transition slowly. Prioritize communication with your children; give them adequate space to adjust, and be accepting and open to discussing their feelings. It can also be wise to put legal protections in place, like an estate plan or establishing a trust to protect their inheritance should a subsequent marriage end.
Setting yourself (and your marriage) up for success
No one wants to repeat the same missteps or go through the same painful experiences from previous relationships. Avoiding the mistakes mentioned in this post can help you protect yourself while also giving your new marriage the best chance of success.